


Pain...

by PhoenixDragon



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angst, Dark, Explicit Sexual Content, Horror, M/M, Torture
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2006-11-18
Updated: 2006-11-18
Packaged: 2017-10-11 23:13:12
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,787
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/118220
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PhoenixDragon/pseuds/PhoenixDragon
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>There came a point when it didn't matter anymore.  When <em>nothing</em> mattered any more.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Pain...

  
There came a point when it didn't matter anymore.

When _nothing_ mattered any more.

When _being_ nothing mattered the most.

When it couldn't _possibly_ hurt any more then it did yesterday, or the day before that, or the day before _that_.

When it just couldn't affect you anymore.

When the emotional hurt no longer registered - when the pain in your heart was gone - it couldn't be possible to hurt anymore, could it?

_Grinding, terrible pressure - the claws in his back sinking into the meat under his shoulder-blades. There was nothing there anymore, nothing there - and god, the pain was so great he felt he might explode. The physical he could handle - already his mind was far above him, floating, weightless in it's cocoon of 'not knowing'._

But his soul. His _heart._

The blackness of the foul disease that gripped him. **Held** him. It would never end, never end, never end...

He screamed once, then bit his lip so hard it bled. Was a small thing though, compared to the other parts of him that bled. He could feel the grey area that meant faintness and pushed past it. No way was he going to pass out now. It had come too far - he had to see -

Was it still HIM?

But then the Black came anyway and swallowed him... His shame and rage at what was happening to him left him weak - _open_.

He was nothing now.

It owned his soul.

It owned _him_ \- and It would never let him forget it...

_' Soooo good....'_

Not even really words anymore. A grunting squeal of thought more than sound... A grating hiss/grumble against the inside of his mind, as It probed and tore into his head, his heart - raping and destroying as It went.

'You'll do anything for me.' It squealed/chuckled gleefully. It wasn't a question. It just _knew_ \- just like he _had always know._

' Speak.'

' Yes.' God, it hurt to say it. The command to speak ripped it out of him, compelled him to respond even as he bit into his tongue, the blood thick and coppery hot. ' Yes... Anything.'

It sighed in sick pleasure and tore his shoulders open, it's strength unspeakable. Unstoppable. Unknown until now.

There was no way to fight, to do anything to give in.

If only he could go insane and make it not matter so much anymore.

' And you will.' It groaned, it's slithery madness a cold thing - a hateful _thing_ \- a whip to hold the servant of it's whims in place.

He _had to be in there somewhere -_

But, when he realised what It was going to do - he said a prayer, sent it out to the unknown from deep inside himself.

/ _Please,_ please _let Him be asleep in there - don't let Him see me like this. Don't let Him know how far it could go._ /

A selfish plea.

A plea for Grace amongst the Devils that God foretold - the Ones He decreed be released upon the Earth.

The Earth he no longer loved.

The Warriors he had forsaken.

And knowing this, knowing that He was probably be awake in there, that He would see that there was no mercy - that He could see what his brother would be willing to do to keep him safe -

The thought horrified him.

He told himself not to struggle - to not make it any harder than it had to be. But that was a useless thought - another selfish whim. He was _raised_ to struggle, to _fight_ \- and no matter how much he hated it sometimes - that's what he would do.

But he knew it would only go as far as his head. It would _make_ him comply. It would _make_ him want.

Want.

He shivered, the blood from his bitten tongue, his mutilated lip - a steady drip-drip of crimson hope against the Nothing.

The Nothing that he was going to die in.

But not today, oh no.

Not today.

He manged to keep from weeping - and tried to remain strong -

For as long as his mind could stay intact.

The nails worked under his shoulders, tearing and gouging - steadying itself, as it prepared for the ultimate insult - the Thing that would surely drive him mad with the sheer horror of it.

He prayed to a God that he didn't believe in that he _would_ go mad - that it would _stop_.

But it didn't then - and it wouldn't now.

It would happen again, and again, and again, and again, and -

His mind was weary with the thought of it - his heart ached.

But his soul, now.

That -

 _That_ , was no longer his.

The first time was the hardest. The first time for _everything_ was the hardest.

But as one more piece of his heart died inside - screaming, shrieking in agony and terror - it became easier.

Until he looked into his eyes - and saw _Him_ in there.

Soon, though, there would be a black hole, an emptiness where his heart was - and then It would kill him.

And he wouldn't have to see _Him_ \- he wouldn't have to see -

_\- He bit his tongue harder, a freshet of scarlet flowing over his lips, holding back a scream as It lifted him, It's yellow, hateful gaze smiling back at him. It considered him, considered his pain - drank it in like a fine, mellow wine - sipped it, guzzled it in, then leaned forward, lips splitting into a horrible familiar smile._

' You suffer so beautifully.' It whispered, the sound like a buzz-saw in his mind. 'So...beautifully.'

He tried to cry out, to pull away as It's impossibly long tongue snaked towards his lips - tasting the blood there - before forcing it's way past, caressing the inside of his mouth.

He wanted to scream, to convulse in revulsion and mind-bending horror - it's tongue tasting of death, of fire and ashes of / _ohsweetjesushis **toothpaste** forgodssakesmakeitstop_/ - but it stopped him - stopped him _cold_ with a quick -

' I'll kill Him.'

He went limp in It's terrible grip, his shoulder-blades forcing out and apart with the pressure of It's claws gouging at the flesh there, suspending him in It's sickening embrace.

It tasted him, ravaged his mouth hungrily - bruising his lips and making him gag with the stench, the rotted _stench_ of It -

He wept.

He tried to stop it, to spare the Demon the pleasure of his agony and to spare _Him_ from -

_/O, God, I'm sorry... I'm so so sorry, sorry, sorry.... God please no more.../_

\- his weakness - his giving IN, his giving UP.

But It hadn't stopped there, oh no - It never would.

He was forever weak, forever broken...

\- to see what he had become - the puppet, the slave to his new Master.

But It was _Him_.

How could It not be?!

And how could he not follow?

How could he not fall in line with this disgusting survival.

Because it was _Him_.

And any day now - He would grant him Death. He would show Mercy and kill him.

He HAD too.

Because he would do the same for Him.

Anything, anything.

All for Him.

_He was tossed - like a half-forgotten plaything would be tossed by an angry toddler - and as he landed, he KNEW -_

And with that knowledge, fear blossomed in his heart like a sick flower - spreading, _decaying_ , all as it grew.

He had never known Fear before.

But he knew it now, as the Thing wearing his brother like a tired suit approached him - Hunger in It's eyes and Agony on It's lips.

' I want your Pain, I want your Rage.' It slurred, It's voice a slimy hand down the small of his spine.

' I _want._ ' A hollow howl inside his mind.

And then It _showed_ him what It wanted.

And if he could have died a thousand deaths -

But he showed _himself_ no such mercy -

As punishment for the Sin of surrender.

He lived...

He succumbed so easily now.

And It let his mind fly away, even as his Spirit screamed for the End to come - even as his body came apart so easily under It's touch.

It's cold, steel, unyielding Touch.

It would do him the disservice of mending him when It had taken it too far - but before It would do so, It would always reign his mind back in, make him FACE it - face the Horror his life had become.

And his heart would break under the pressure of it, crack and _bleed_ -

But he remained hopelessly, helplessly sane all throughout.

It let his mind go free now.

In the beginning - the beginning of the End - It wouldn't allow him that luxury.

And for a little while, for that small window in Time - he had the comfort of Madness.

Until the time came again where -

 _\- It was there, on top of him so_ fast _\- It's breath reeking of disease and murder, looming over him in a careless fashion that suggested that he wasn't going anywhere._

His terror tweaked up a notch, and he let his mind go into that Zone.

The Zone where nothing could touch him - where nothing could _harm_ him -

And a Hook of immense pain and steely Will reeled him back - making him SEE.

' No, no, My Pet.' It chuckled - the sound of axes falling and glass breaking. ' No fighting me, now. Enjoy what I - what WE - offer you.'

' No.' He moaned, tongue a thick roll of deadened flesh in his mouth, the words forced out of him with the sheer pain of it all. ' No. He would never -'

' But we _will_ Pet. We WILL.'

A laugh, as he struggled against the nothing that held him down, held him immobile - the grit of unswept concrete digging into the liquid, throbbing scream of his shoulders, grounding him - forcing him to think clearly in a situation gone out of control - a situation that had plummeted into Insanity in such a short span of time.

His heart howled at the thought of what He would see, of what He would witness - as His body defiled His brother.

_/Turn away. Go to sleep. Don't look, don't -/_

' Enough!' It hissed, slapping away his thoughts with a lazy grace - a wave of the hand, a quirk of an eyebrow. So familiar, and so very, very _wrong_.

' See. Hear. Feel. And know that you are mine. All Mine.'

He flicked a finger casually at his shirt - and he watched it disintegrate, _melt_ right off of his torso. It's eyes held him, as the Thing ran it's fingers delicately over his chest, It's touch ice - cold, so _cold_ \- it burned and flamed across the skin.

He thought he would see welts if he looked down, and was surprised that the flesh remained unmarred, a stretch of tan touched here and there with old scars of long ago battles - battles that seemed pointless, now.

All too soon, as the minutes faded into what felt like hours - he began praying for the icy fire to become numbness, the muted heat of the cold a dancing agony over his bones -

Instead it intensified - now a burning sheet of acid boiling under his skin - the physical pain a mere accent of what was to come.

' So beautiful.' It crooned. ' You know that He would watch you, right? Admire you? How he longed to touch? To taste?'

' You lie!' He squeezed out - his tongue lolling limply along his lips. ' You fucking _liar_! He would never-'

His tongue cleaved to the roof of his mouth, still him, hushing him as he fought for dominance over his own body.

' God, yes...' It moaned. ' Fight me. Struggle...'

It caught his angry thoughts, his inner screams of rage and Ate them - the leftovers of them fading away like plumes of smoke, leaving him panting and empty - unable to do anything but watch his own doom as it tortured him with It's fingers and tongue - the slimy protrusion limping out to ooze along his ribcage, tasting the sweat there.

The combination of cold, slime and burning steel tipped him over the edge, his thoughts now useless cries for mercy, even as he tightened his lips to hold it all in.

The Thing chuckled in sick glee, tongue playing with one of his nipples, leaving it feeling shriveled and dead.

' Beg, Dear One. Beg Me for Mercy.'

' No...' But it was agony, not being able to cry for help, to plead with It.

His mind faltered, staggered under the pressure of It's Will.

It seemed disappointed - but that lasted mere seconds as It listened in on his thoughts, his muffled inner wails that had become insensible murmurs of pain.

' You will soon, Little One. Soon you will do anything I say. You will _beg_ for me to violate you - if that's what it takes to save Him - to save _yourself_. Soon, so very soon. You will welcome me willingly - and the delicious thing is -

You know it.'

It seemed tired of taunting him -

It ripped his jeans off of him like they were flimsy paper, Its claws catching in the fabric, hooking it - as they purred apart with a rough silken sound. His legs fell open lifelessly, the pressure on his flesh immense - a grey weight of inexorable strength as an invisible grip held them open, held him down. He knew what was going to happen, but he couldn't seem to wrap his mind around it - the impossibility of it, as that familiar smile cracked across his brother's cheerful, handsome face once more.

' Well,' It chuckled. ' Let's see what we've got here.'

It reared up on It's knees, stroking absently at the bulge in It's jeans as It looked Its victim over.

He had never thought of himself as a victim before - even with all the crap that life had dealt him, he had never _been_ a victim.

But, now.

He pain in his back intensified as his hips lifted, seemingly of their own volition, his legs popping in their sockets - eyes riveted, _held_ \- to that thickening bulge in those jeans - sickened and fascinated all at once -

Like a rodent is before the stare of a cobra.

He was now the rodent -

And he knew that the shame of this would never wash away - it would exist in his heart and his soul for the rest of Eternity.

He mourned what they had become, as the Thing took Its time - a smile playing about It's lips as it unzipped It's pants and removed his brother's cock, the length of it stretching and filling still, as It stared at his helpless, unwilling surrender.

' I can make it easier for you. If you Beg. Beg now - save your soul.'

He shook his head mutely - a flicker of pride rising in his heart.

He wouldn't beg.

He wouldn't acknowledge this - he would allow himself one scream - oh, he knew it was going to happen.

But only one.

He had no idea that It had other plans.

' I will Take you. I will Own you - like your brother always wanted - to slip inside you - to Tame you to His Will.'

He managed to find some small strength - not enough to move his body, but just enough to shake his head defiantly.

' Oh, yes, My Love - and now. Now we shall get what He wants - what _I_ want.'

It's burning, icy hands gripped his hips -

And he was impaled upon his brother's dick - though that same instrument was no longer his brother's - it was burning chilled steel, like It's hands, and as the head of it breached him, he could feel Madness get a firm hold on the edges of his mind.

It didn't plunder him, stroke into him in one smooth, tearing motion - oh no. That, would most likely be more merciful - and mercy was the opposite of what it had in store for him.

It pushed in slowly, oh so slowly - using the slick slipperiness of his own blood to ease It's entry as he tore and shredded around the heated ice of It's cock, his insides flaming and shrieking in agony as it speared through him like a sword, irrevocably, insanely slow. It went on forever, pushing in, spreading him - the chill of It's invasion creeping into his bones.

But the ultimate horror was yet to come.

Eventually eons later, as It dominated in his struggle to let his mind escape - forcing him to witness his own rape as It filled him with It's hateful length - It came to rest, the bulge of It's balls rubbing against his ass, even through the fabric of It's jeans. The only thing that touched him beyond the cruel rapier of It's dick, was the steely clamps of It's fingers as It still his hips for penetration.

It moaned and hissed in It's own ancient Tongue, pleasure evident on the fallen shadow of It's face -

But after It was comfortably (for It) inside of him, It switched gears.

' Oh, yes...' His brother's voice issued smoothly from between It's lips - and he could feel his mind pitch towards the welcome Blackness of Insanity - only the Creature's grip inside his mind kept him on the other side of that line - and he cursed It and wept as he stared in stark pain at his beloved brother's face - the face of his Destroyer.

' God, how long I've wanted to fuck you.' He/It breathed, pulling out slightly and sliding oh-so-smoothly back inside of him. ' To feel you around my cock. God, the _bliss_.'

He could feel the warm stickiness of his own blood as it dripped down the sides of his thighs, the pit-pat-pit of the droplets hitting the floor a welcome distraction - anything, anything to not hear this - to not HEAR it!!

' Now I get to take you - to cum inside you, like I've always wanted - like YOU'VE always wanted. For me to dominate you, make you mine - mark you forever.'

**Demons always speak some truth.**

His father's words.

Was that true then?

Did his brother truly harbor a secret desire for him?

The thought made him ill, crushed his heart beneath the vileness of it, even as his brother's thick cock pulled all the way out, only to slam back in - a little faster this time, a little more forcefully. Something deep inside him fizzed and sparked - and to his utter horror and shame, his own cock began to fill.

' Oh, yes.' It gurgled in his brother's sweet, musical voice, ' Yes, show me how much you want it.'

His hips twitched as It applied more speed and pressure to It's movements, cock sliding easier now as It pumped him the electric fuzz in his belly shooting through him as his cock became fully hard.

' No.' He mumbled thickly - voice heavy with the tears that wanted to fall, the tears that carried his pain, his surrender. ' Please...'

' Oh, you want me to touch it?' The Demon purred, It's voice half his brother's, half It's own. ' I'm more than happy to, My Love.'

It wrapped It's chilly grip around the blooming heat that was his cock, and he cried out from the terrible pleasure of it, his body responding to the constant stroking inside, as the hand squeezed and caressed him outside. It's hands were everywhere - on his cock, his balls, tweaking and pinching his nipples as It rode him faster and faster grunting and cursing him in his brother's strident tones.

' That's it you motherfucker. Fucking ride me - cum for me, cum for me like a whore!' It screamed, laughing heartily as he screamed back in fear, agony, bliss and pain, his shame overriding all thought, as his hips jumped and slid along the cock inside him, insides milking his brother's dick, as he himself road the wave of orgasm - fury and humiliation making his voice raw - tearing his throat.

' Yes, yes!!' It howled, the void opening in It's mind, tearing and clawing at him inside his head as it shot acidic cum deep into his guts.

It continued to fuck him until It's cock softened, but by then he had already retreated inside his head - trying to crawl away from what was happening to him - what _had_ happened to him.

' I'll let you rest now.' It broke in, shattering his thoughts, as It pulled out and away from his torn and limp body. It had no need to hold him down now - the worst was over -

It had Won.

He continued in his brother's wonderful, much loved - and now much feared - voice, rolling his tones and subtle meanings in such heart-breakingly familiar and once cherished ways. It once meant safety - family. It would soon come to be known with horror and pain.

' Yes. Rest.' It mused thoughtfully. 'Later, I'll want to fuck your gorgeous mouth - then, maybe... I'll get to hear you beg and scream. How wonderful would that be?'

A terrible chuckle - a sound of mirth, a sound of joy -

And he knew then, as he knows now - Death would be a long time in coming.

And when that time came - he would beg for it, mindlessly, relieved and rejoicing as Salvation arrived in the form of a bullet, or a knife, or a quick snap of the neck.

He thought it was over, until he heard the broken, shocked voice of his brother slam into him from nowhere - and in disbelief and shame - he raised his head to look into his brother's eyes, and saw what he feared most -

The calm warmth of familiar irises and the endless horror of pity and grief.

' Oh, God, Dean. Dean - I am so sorry - please... Please forgive me.'

And to his endless sorrow, Sammy wept... He folded his brother in his arms as best as he could - the loss of blood and the cold of his heart almost overwhelming him in the end - but he held his brother, and rocked him and comforted him, until the Black came to carry him away.

He never took the opportunity to kill either of them that fateful day - and even if his head had been sane enough to comprehend the window, the moment - he would not have changed a thing.

It was the last time he would look into his brother's eyes and see HIM - it was the last time he would hold his brother and try to keep the monsters at bay.

It was the last time he would have strength to feel anything but despair.

And all too soon it was over.

And he fell once more into -

\- the depths of Hell he now knew as Home.

Where all he could hope for, all he could pray for, was the numbness to steal the last of his heart.

Then maybe, when the End of this Hell came for him, he'd find the strength to love his brother once more -

And bring the End about for them both...

  
**~finis~**

**Author's Note:**

> A/N: I was feeling slightly evil today -and this popped out. Tis complete too!! (Is as surprised as you all are, lol!) This is my first foray into Wincest, and probably will not be my last - though if I do it again, it will be non-con - the only way you'll get it outta me folks, lol! Fic is unbeta'd  
> Disclaimer(s): I don't own 'em. Nope - Kripke and Co. own them! I'm only playing with them for a little while - tho' I can't promise I'll return them in the same condition that I found 'em in. *Evil Grin* Enjoy!

**Works inspired by this one:**

  * [Last Line of Defense (The Killed With Kindness Remix)](https://archiveofourown.org/works/1579586) by [BrighteyedJill](https://archiveofourown.org/users/BrighteyedJill/pseuds/BrighteyedJill)




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